I want to come to you today and spill my heart to you, telling you how good we are all doing, that we are able to understand and accept this incredible loss and this unmeasurable feeling of sadness in our hearts.  But I would be lying.

Fortunately, everything that could be making us ache a little less, the love of our family, the cards, the flowers, the food that just shows up on our doorstep, the gifts, the e-mails, the support and comments on this blog, bring a shred of bright, beautiful light that we need during these very darkest of days.  Thank you, thank you, thank you.  Someday, I will reach out to you individually, but for now, this will have to do.  Thank you a thousand times over.

I've had many people inquire as to if we have a place where individuals can make a donation in honor of our precious Jakie and James, the answer is yes.  If you click here, it will lead you to a page for the March of Dimes.  Back in December, one of my dearest friends, Amy, lost her daughter, Lydia, to anencephaly.  Amy is currently fundraising for the March of Dimes in honor of her daughter.  If you'd like to make a donation, just click here and you can donate, please just reference our babies, Jake and James F.

Thank you again for the kindness in your words, for the tears you have shed and for the love that you feel for our family.  I wish I had some other way to convey to you how I feel about you, Oh God, do I wish for that, but for now I hope you can feel it from these words.

Comments

[jenny]

you all are in my heart. i am so sorry for your loss. words cannot express...

[Susan]

No need to thank...this is what we do. Love each other. Even those we don't know, face-to-face and might never on this side of Heaven.
Hugs...and hugs.

[Chrissy Witt]

My heart goes out to you and your family, I can't express how much. Continuing to lift your family in prayer. One step and one day at a time!

[Veronica Mitchell]

I have been out of town and away from blogs for awhile due to a death in the family, so I only read the sad news today. I am so, so sorry. There are no words.

[charmed]

Take your time sweetie, and remember your boys, miss them, love them, and mourn them. Hold on to God's hand, he knows where you are, and is right there with you.

[Adventures In Babywearing]

You continue to amaze. You may not feel it on the inside there, but on the outside here you are our hero. Such generosity during this difficult time for you. Beth, you and your family, sweet Jake & James- you have touched and are touching us more than you know.

Much love,
Steph

[Adventures In Babywearing]

P.S. I feel like I suck at saying the right thing here.

You never asked to be a hero. I know this. My whole heart goes out to you all.

Love,
Steph

[Rebecca]

Yeah, what Susan said. :)

Hugs...

[tammy b]

this is what we do, your sister friends in the imaginary world. we grieve with you. we hold your pain in our hearts. we understand. we cry. we care. we love.

[Shantel]

Beth,

There is no reason to thank any of us. This is what friends are for even if we don't know you personally. You amaze me. You are so thoughtful. Take care of yourself and we will all continue to pray for you, your family and those beautiful boys James and Jake. Take care of yourself.

Hugs,
Shantel

[Neicy]

Words cannot express what I want to say to you. My heart is breaking for you and your beautiful family. It's never easy, but with God all things are possible, even at times like these. I'll continue to lift you guys up in prayers....God Bless you.

[jillyree]

I have just read your story over on Pinks and Blues, and please allow me to send to you and your family my deepest condolences. I, unfortunately, have been in your shoes, and want you to know that I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers daily.

[Amy F.]

I am in awe of you. How you have the energy and words to share with the internet world is amazing. You have every right to be as private as you want to be at this time and we would respect and understand that, of course. But we do long to see a post from you, to know that you are surviving. We love you for so many reasons, but especially for your candidness and transparency.

You are UNbelievable that in YOUR grief and the loss of YOUR babies you bring up my baby. Thank you for directing those who love and care about you to the March of Dimes through me. All of the money raised will go towards giving EVERY baby a healthy beginning. I will be walking in April not only for Lydia, but also in honor of precious James and Jake. I've been thinking a lot about Jesus holding all three babies on his lap and loving on them.

I hope you are able to sleep, but I know how hard it is. When I could not turn off my mind, my friend, Emily, shared this verse with me and it helped me rest in the Lord.

I will lie down and sleep in peace, for you alone, O Lord, make me dwell in safety (Psalm 4:8).

I will continue to pray for your entire family and for you to find some peace, dear friend.

[Bloggygirl]

You are showing a gazillion tons of love to us with each post. You're so caring and we will be here for you forever.

Love ya!

[Monica]

The strength you have shown in the words you wrote show me at least your thanks. I will continue to pray for you and your family. I am sure that your boys are watching over all of you. God Bless!

[Lora Dietz]

Beth, I cried (again) when I read your post today. You are such a loving, giving person. Even in your deep sorrow you are thinking of others. James, Jake, Racecar & Ariel are blessed with a wonderful mommy.

[Lora Dietz]

Beth, I cried (again) when I read your post today. You are such a loving, giving person. Even in your deep sorrow you are thinking of others. James, Jake, Racecar & Ariel are blessed with a wonderful mommy.

[Mary C]

Oh, Beth. I wish I knew what to say. If I knew you (in real life) I would just give you the longest hug and pray for you. Bless your heart.

[Autumn Dahlia]

Thinking about you everyday. Hoping each is a little easier.

Lots of love to you.

[Cori]

I don't think I've ever commented here but I want to tell you that you and your family are in my prayers and the prayers of my family. May God's comforting hand be on you all during this time.

[redfish]

There is no right or wrong way to grieve. Don't feel like you have to understand anything. It's OK to be mad at God and to feel whatever you feel. He can take it. I'm continuing to pray for you. You are loved.

[Josephine]

You don't know me, but I stumbled upon your story. I am so sorry for your losses and wish peace and understanding, in time, for you and your family.

[Tina]

Just wanted to let you know that you are in my thoughts and prayers!

[Susan]

Just wanted to send you more love. I think about you all a lot, God sent you lots of friends in the flesh and through this wonderful little internet community. I'm sure He's taking care of you in ways you can't even imagine.

[Tracy F]

Hi Beth,
Just stopping by to tell you that I continue to think about you and your family. True friends are here, whether their have been disagreements over things in the past or not. There is a connection that will never leave. We shared the growth of our children while pulling together for those fighting. We are bonded by that and because of that, I feel your loss. I wish I lived closer to help you out in anyway that I could, but the blessing in all of this is the family that surrounds all of you. You have so many shoulders to lean on and hands to hold. Find your strength in your faith, family and friends.