City of Angels

One of my favorite movies is City of Angels, I don't know what it is about that movie, if it's the music or Nick Cage as an angel or Meg Ryan as a heart surgeon or just a great story line that makes you think about life and death, but I have seen it a million times and I feel the need to watch it again, someday. 

I've never been to Los Angeles, I've actually never been to California.  Have you?  Do you like it?  Brian and I just spoke and he has an opportunity to go there in April for work and wanted to know if I wanted to go along.  We would be gone for four nights over the weekend, away from the kids, in a nice hotel, with warm weather.  And the thought freaks me out.  Three weeks ago I would have jumped at the chance, but now?  I'm not so sure.  Am I ready?  Should I go?  Do I think Brian and I need time alone?  Yes.  But right now I'm having a hard enough time going to the grocery store, let alone going somewhere two thousand miles away.  But it's a month away, a lot can happen before then.  Will I be ready for such a trip by then?  Would it be good for me?  For us?  (by the way, when Brian goes away for work, he has a lot of free time - so I would not be alone that much.)

Brian initially told me he needed to know by the end of day today.  But after my panic attack he said he could probably let them know by Monday. 

Should we go?  You know, assuming we could get someone to watch the kids.

Comments

[Adventures In Babywearing]

Oh, I think you might like it. It could be good- but only if you feel it deep in your gut. I've only been to San Diego & around that area... and it's GORGEOUS.

Steph

[Thea @ I'm a Drama Mama]

I think changes of scenery are always good. We loved San Diego when we went a couple of years ago, but I've never been to LA. We are going in May, so considering it a scouting trip for me : )

[Nerd Girl]

I say go. I'm a native Californian, so of course I love it, but I think the time away with just your honey would be great for both of you.

[crookedeyebrow]

Go!
It's sunny an warm and good for the soul.

Yes, go. I'll help you pack.

~CE

[Kelly @ Love Well]

When I was growing up in Minnesota, I had the biggest California crush you can imagine. So I completely relate to the apprehension of going to the place you've imagined and probably over-imagined for years.

Eventually, I ended up living in San Diego for almost 10 years. Which gives me the credibility to say -- Los Angeles? Eh. It's not what you want it to be. (A sweet old lady I met on my first trip there said, "Honey, if you wanted to see Hollywood, you missed it by about 70 years.") It's crowded, smoggy and skanky. If you get a clear day and you can visit the beach, it might be OK. But really? Eh.

However, I really think if you can handle the emotional impact of going, you should go. The time alone with Brian would be amazing, and it's always fun to visit a place you've dreamed about. Even if it doesn't live up to your expectations.

If you want any more specific info, feel free to e-mail me.

[Kelly @ Love Well]

Should add -- San Diego is a completely different animal than L.A. So if you have a chance to drive south during your visit, you should definitely do that.

[girlymama]

We went out to San Diego (when husband had a business trip) in the fall and it was WONDERFUL. We forgot how much we liked just being together - away from kids and laundry and the house and everything - with nothing to do except decide what restaurant to eat at that night.
I highly recommend the chance to reconnect and spend time away from the stresses of home. Its not until April - you may be ready to get away by then!

[jenny]

go. it's four days and i think your mind and body could use the sunlight and warmth!

[Megan (FriedOkra)]

Oh to get away from the remaining days of cold here and spend some time alone with my own honey. I think you should most definitely go - Even if you just spend your days poolside taking in the sun and reading, it'd be an awesome getaway. Something about the West Coast always presses my mental reset button, in a good way.

Besides, having something like a trip to look forward to and plan for would give you something to set your sights on - to focus a bit of attention on, which would be helpful, wouldn't it?

Go.

[brandi]

yes, go. i think it will do you both some good.

[Penny]

Go If you think you could have even a little bit of a good time. It may be fun to go on an adventure with your husband. One of those things that your not sure you are going to like till you get it. Maybe Brian wants to go with you. Maybe he doesn't want to go alone??

Just do what ever makes sense to you. Its hard to judge how you will be feeling in a month. Maybe say yes and if you change your mind you are just out a plane ticket.

[Ok, Where Was I?]

I won't tell you whether to go or not b/c I feel like I don't know you at all. I just hope you don't feel guilty, whatever you choose. I read through the posts since I was last here and just wanted to say that I think about your family everyday and hope that you are finding some comfort. Your children are just beautiful in those photos below, as are those quilts--what a great sister!

[AmyA]

Beth, I say...go, go, go! I agree that it will give you something to look forward to and I think the days alone with Brian will be healing for both of you. You both need it. ...ok, you can tell me your decision when I get there.

[elle]

Go. The sun will do you good. There is lots to see in LA and it will be an interesting cultural experience. Besides, it really will be good for you and Brian.

[Ryley]

I say.. ABSOLUTELY! Wouldn't a change of scenery be nice?? For one day not have to drive by the store you bought materinty clothes at.. or eat at that restraunt that gave you heart burn??

I think it would be great.. to just spend a few days being carefree!

And the best part about leaving the kids... the happiness that have when you come back!! Those giant hugs.. and watching them get the presents you got for them! :)

I think the best medicine when you are sad or down is to have something fun to look forward too. Right now you just live day by day.. but won't it be fun to look forward to something? To know what the future holds???

I say go.. but on the other hand... if you REALLY don't want too. Then don't force yourself. You dont want to end up more sad there.. or having to fly home alone the next day because you miss the kids so much!

Go with your feelings!!

[Fiddledeedee (It Coulda Been Worse)]

I say DO IT! I lived in LA for 10 years, and still miss it. The weather, shopping, people, mountains, and you name it. It is an awesome place to blend in and do a bit of people watching.

And hit "Pinks" on La Brea for a chili cheese dog. Or Disney Land.

Just go and spend some time with your husband.

[Bloggygirl]

Ok, I didn't even read your whole post. It was 11:11 and I said to myself JJF's telling me you posted something new. Told you it works!

My hillbilly self lived in LA for 2 years you have to see that city it's amazing. Everyone's so kindhearted and welcoming.

Now I'll finish reading the post.

Take care!

[Bloggygirl]

I read the rest...you HAVE to go! Send your panic attacks to me I have so many a few more won't hurt. But go go go, you need that experience and change of venue!

[Marlen]

I think it may be just what you need. But, only commit to going if you are sure you can go and not stress about going or being away or whatever. You want to be able to enjoy yourself, too. Just my 2 cents.....

[J. Fergie]

i think you should totally go. it sounds like it could be just what you need. but make sure not to stress about it.

[Rebecca]

I know you don't know me from Adam... but I say "go"!

[kel]

Yes! I LOVE LA and the southern CA area. Truly. The beach isn't very far away, or you can go for a short hike in the hills, or you can just go shopping. It's not all big sky-rises and city... unless you want to stay in the city. I think the beach is very therapeutic. My favorite is Newport Beach. Have fun!

[sunshine]

When we lost our son, I let the inlaws take the kids for a week. We'd never been away from them for more than a night before then. We were house hunting in another state. It was so good to be able to cry without worrying if I was too out-of-control for the kids. My daughter wouldn't be able to tell the people at the check-out that "my mom's baby died". I could just be a person. It was also really great because we got to hurt and heal and laugh as a couple.
I don't know what's right for you, but it helped me.

[Mary C]

I don't think it's a coincidence this opportunity came up at this time...I think you should go! God sent you this trip. Sun ALWAYS does the soul and body good and will give you something to look forward to!

[neicy]

I would definately say go for it! It sounds like a wonderful opportunity for you. Fresh air, sunshine, time with your hubby... sounds magical to me....